The Kids and The Crazies

I’ve been single since last summer, which has been fine with me since I’ve been pretty busy with school, living out of town, plus everything happening at home. Although since then, I have managed to squeeze in a couple dates here a and there as well. I will admit though, this summer I wish I lived somewhere with a bit more population, especially around my age, it would make my summer slightly more enjoyable and actually give me people to hang out with. But that’s not really what this post is about. Its about the type of girls I seem to attract and the ones that ask me out.

The title really says it all, most of the girls that get huge crushes or ask me out are the kids or the crazies! I don’t understand it, but that’s what it seems like for me. Maybe I have some sort of built in maniac magnet? Whatever it might be though, always makes for an awkward or interesting situation.

I figure that the best way to demonstrate this, would be to give a couple examples of the girls that have taken an interest in me. So here they are, in all their glory.

 

Marlene:

Marlene is a young lady that was friends with another girl that I hung out with from time to time. So needless to say, I saw her on a semi-often basis. I didn’t mind if she was around though because she was fairly quiet and didn’t bother us too much, but did give her two cents every once in a while.

A while ago though, my town had a community clean up event going, called the “Trash Bash”, where volunteers go around town and pick up any garbage that they find. Of course being such a small town, Marlene was there as well, and of course with my luck, the event organizer partnered her with me. But that was alright at the time, I didn’t really want to be with one of the old people that would go really slow. Plus I already knew Marlene so it limited the “getting to know small talk” that I hate so much.

During the Trash Bash, I was just being my silly self and of course cracked a lot of jokes and made Marlene laugh lots. So yes, I probably did have it coming, but who knew a girl almost half my age would be compelled to express that she liked me?

Yes, at the time I was 21 and she was 13. “Almost 14”, as she would say.

But at the end of the Trash Bash we packed everything up and returned our garbage sticks to the organizers. Then before I jumped in my car to leave, Marlene ran up to me… I figured she was going to ask for a ride or something, but boy, did she ever catch me off guard! I gotta give her an A for effort though and it was rather cute too.

She said, “I know your a bit older than me and going to college and everything”. Where I nodded and agreed, except its more like a LOT older than you and going to university… She continued saying, “but I really like you and was hoping that you would be my boyfriend?”. That’s where she really caught me off guard. I had no idea what to tell her and stumbled around a few opening words while hurrying to try and find something to say to let her down nicely. So I finally managed to get out something along the lines that she was right, she’s a lot younger than me and I’m too busy to have girlfriend so I didn’t think it was good idea.

The whole thing felt so awkward though and I felt like stabbing my eyeballs out the whole time.

Luckily she got the message, but once she turned 14, she decided to get a job where I work. So I guess she’s one of those people that you just can’t escape in a small town! So it feels a little awkward sometimes at work, even though she hasn’t bothered me anymore.

 

Natalie:

Natalie is an interesting one to say the least. I didn’t really have a choice of meeting her neither because at the start of the winter semester she was in my Chemistry class and sat beside me saying, “I will now be your friend and you will eventually come to terms with that”. So I guess we are friends, she’s very entertaining so I’m alright with that, in moderation though. But it gets better, later in the day I ended up having my Cell Biology class with her as well. So there was no escaping, she sat beside me there too, forcing our friendship the entire time.

After a while though, I found out why she was so weird. In one of our seminars for Cell Biology I was eating a puff wheat square for lunch, so Natalie decided to tell me all about how she tried to make them once when she was staying at a halfway house for the mentally insane.

For those that don’t know, a halfway house for the mentally insane is basically where crazy people go before getting integrated back into society.

Natalie is kinda creepy though, she always seems to know things that occur in my life before I even tell her. I do have her on Facebook, so that would explain it, except that I have her on a limited profile where she can’t see all that much… Also there’s this other Natalie in our class, so she makes a habit of stalking her and getting to know her without actually talking to her.

I have managed to escape getting asked out from Natalie, except she’s hinted quite a lot and is always touching my arms and trying to give me hugs. Usually I’m ok with that, I’m a very touchy person, but the way she does it makes it feel so weird and wrong. I’m not sure if its her cold and clammy hands or how she does it, but it gives me the chills.

I have managed to escape her some during the summer, but she warned me on Facebook last week that she’s super clingy and I should expect a huge tackle hug from her on the first day back.

 

So that’s only two examples, but there are more believe it or not. There’s Shelby from Physics, who likes to scratch her elbow and cackle at herself because of it. There’s also Darby, who’s incredibly young yet always hits on me in the weirdest ways. Hopefully I’ll start getting a little better luck with the type of girls that like me soon.

 

“Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit they are crazy” – Nora Ephron

 

Tyson Trepidations.

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4 responses to “The Kids and The Crazies

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