Boys Eat Dirt

One of my older sisters came down today for the long weekend, and we were all making a bit of a plan for our trip to Vancouver next week for the concert. Next thing we knew, we were talking about how it’s the first time we are doing something together in a while. I mean I’ll hang out with my sisters, but usually its one at a time sort of thing.

My sister Phalon is pretty close to my age. She’s only a year older (except people constantly think that she’s younger than me). Then my next sister, Paige, is seven years older than me.

Somehow we got talking about some of the stunts that my sister Phalon and I got into when we were younger since we were so close in age.

When we were really young (I think I was going on 4 years old), and just moved to this town, I was playing outside in the dirt with my sister. My sister started telling me that I should eat some of the dirt. But being a smart almost 4 year old, I knew something was awry. So I inquired, “Why?”.

Her response to my question was something like, ” Well because all boys eat dirt!”

Of course being the much smarter, younger brother, I added, “But I never saw dad eating any dirt.”

Then came the trickery, and probably what scarred me to be the odd person I am today. My sister told me, “That’s because he does it at work with all the other boys that work there.”

So I ate dirt.

The moral of the story:

Girls are evil.

Sisters are evil.

I guess I was a little evil too as a child, but my sister was always right there by my side doing the same too. Heck, she probably egged half of it on like that dirt eating incident.

I remember our first neighbors when we moved here. They were always pretty nice at first, but after a couple of years, when I was about six or seven, they started being not very friendly to my parents. So as a result, my sister and I decided to get payback against them.

We always heard our parents talking about making their lawn greener than our neighbours too, so we decided to help them out as our first payback. So one day when our neighbours weren’t home, we took some of their bleach that they left outside and poured the entire bottle all over their front lawn. It was pretty genius of us too considering that those spots of their lawn were completely dead after some time. Then the same day, we also decided to clog their eaves, so we shoved every page from the newspaper into their eaves spout. I think we did that one because we sat there waiting about 2 minutes for their lawn to die, and when it didn’t die before our eyes, we wanted to make sure we made our point.

Over the months we tried to do more to get our revenge too.

During the fall time, they had these plants along the top of the fence, so we knocked every single of them down into their yard. During the winter we shovelled all of our snow from our back yard, into their driveway, and even made sure to get some doggy doo doo in with it too. Then in the spring, more specifically, at Easter, we got a bunch of gum from the Easter Bunny. So we chewed all of it, made a huge glob and wrapped it around the tree in their yard.

We were quite the deviants. I think those must have been the rebel days of our lives too. I kinda feel bad for our neighbours now, but I guess we could have done worse right? Besides, we were young and didn’t know any better from pouring bleach on the neighbours lawn.

“One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree. ‘Which road do I take?’ she asked. ‘Where do you want to go?’ was his response. ‘I don’t know,’ Alice answered. ‘Then,’ said the cat, ‘it doesn’t matter.” – Alice In Wonderland

Tyson Trepidations.

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Multiple Personalities and Oojaboojan Valley

While growing up, I had quite an insane but wonderful imagination that I shared with my best friend, Steve. We would constantly make new worlds and travel in between each one. We even created other specie races and had multiple personalities we transferred between. No, we weren’t crazy with some sort of multiple personality disorder, we just felt as though our creations needed more characters!

Our imagination really ran for a long time though, straight into our teenage years and sometimes still do, even though I’m turning 22 in October. But that’s alright, its nice to slip back  into childhood once in a while, right?

Most of our different personalities were just different forms of our names. When we were ourselves, it was Steve and Tyson. When we were the villains it was Stevaha and Tysonee. When we were the brilliant scientists/inventors it was Evets and Nosyt. We even had a crazy person personality (not like we really needed it) from the land of Dalmatia, named Stiv and Tajson.

Our most common playground was always behind our houses.

Steve became my next door neighbour partway through our friendship and we had this mountain that started right behind our houses. We would constantly climb up there and turn it into whatever world we wanted to.

One of the times we were going up my dad was building a new fence, so he had all these boards from our old fence that were still perfectly good. We took the boards up with us, a few at a time. Just brining all that wood basically took an entire day. But once up there, we managed to scrounge up all the old but still usable nails that were pulled out of those boards and got to work building ourselves a fort.

Of course, knowing us, our old fence was pink, so we were going to have a very manly, pink fort!

There was this one area up on that hill that was kinda like a valley, on either side of us were pretty steep banks. This place, we called Oojaboojan valley. It was where the mythical Oojaboojans lived.

The Oojaboojans were a race that Steve and I made up and stuck with for many many years, even making up a call for them and a special Oojaboojan language.

Ultimately, we decided to build our fort just at the entrance of the Oojaboojan valley, that way we would still be outside of it, and the hostile Oojaboojans wouldn’t attack us.

It took us about a week, but we eventually had our beautiful pink fort built. We used a fallen tree as an anchor point to get started, giving us a sturdy beam to build the roof upon. We even built ourselves a bench and made the roof waterproof with a yellow tarp. Plus, we also a added a fence for defence, in case the Oojaboojans did decide to attack us. All in all, we had a wicked pink fort with a yellow roof. It was pretty big area-wise, but we had to duck down a little when we were inside of it. Even still, it was our haven and we were very proud of what we accomplished. Sometimes it even served as our headquarters when we spied on the cute girl that lived on the other side of our houses.

Eventually our fun had to end though. The cute girl that lived in our neighbourhood moved away with her parents and the town began developing log homes on that mountain where our fort was. So yes, they destroyed our fort and ran the Oojaboojans out of their valley for their purposes.

But that didn’t keep us off the mountain. We still climbed up there, but hiked further and went on more outrageous adventures to the mountain peaks. The mountain was formed with three peaks, each fairly close, so we could hike to all of them in one day if we wanted to (and sometimes we did). Each peak had its own name, there was Death Peak, named by its many cliffs that surrounded it, making only one way possible to get up there. Not to mention everything on that peak was dead due to a forest fire. There was also Abporson’s Palace as one of the peaks, it housed an ancient kingdom that could only be seen once on the highest point of that peak. Then there was the largest and highest of the three, entitled The Neverending Mountain. All of these peaks were always dangerous to us. Since the Oojaboojans were driven from their home, they had scattered throughout each of the peaks, and we had constantly undergone many epic battles on our journeys.

Most kids do have an imagination to some degree, but from what I observed as a kid, I think Steve and I took ours a lot further than most other kids. When we describe some of the games we used to play and everything we made up, people would give us some crazy looks. Plus, when we hung around with many other kids, they were never quite as inventive as we were. They always based things off of movies or television shows they had watched, but we were never interested in copying what was already made up. But I’m sure there were some kids just as crazy as we had been.

 

“I am imagination. I can see what the eyes cannot see. I can hear what the ears cannot hear. I can feel what the heart cannot feel” – Peter Nivio Zarlenga

 

Tyson Trepidations.